Reactions by others to one's pain of pregnancy and infant loss can be a huge deterrent in the healing process for families going through the grief of losing a little one.

Linda MarekIn Manitoba, October 15th is designated as Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day, however, events take place throughout the month to bring awareness.

Linda Marek, executive director of the Pembina Valley Pregnancy Care Centre, says finding a safe place to share your grief can be helping step in the process to begin healing.  If you're experiencing loss, Marek said they want people to know they are available to support you, and for you to know that you're cared for and validated in what you've experienced. "The loss is very real," said Marek.  "Some people might say otherwise, but it's a very real sense of loss.  It's always very personal."  
 
Marek said because some woman have been dismissed or their loss has been belittled, they don't feel it's safe to talk about. "Or if it happens a second time or a third time, all of that builds and accumulates in a person in a very deep way.  We think it's a really important healing step for them if that's something they feel they need to take."  
 
Marek said not every woman does feel the need to talk to someone, but if they do, and they're not receiving supports that make sense for them at that point, they would love to see them, connect with them, and be available.  She notes they are there for men too, as their grief is just as deep.
 
 
Marek encourages people to be compassionate and sensitive to those in their lives who have lost, as different days will different meanings for people. "The day they found out they were pregnant, or the day they lost, their due date, mother's day and father's day, all of those days will have different meanings and significance for people who have lost."  Marek says it's important to acknowledge that, as it's not just about October 15th or the month of October.